As a person who has dealt with anxiety for many years, I’ve learned some helpful tools along the way. Some I’ve practiced for a long time, and others I’m still discovering. One of the most helpful has actually been a relatively recent realization.
I’ve spent a lot of time getting to know myself- working to strengthen weaker areas within me, understanding my thought patterns, and recognizing certain perspectives that can sometimes be problematic. And through that process, I’ve noticed something interesting about anxiety.
When I’m caught up in the spin of anxious thoughts, so much of my attention tends to turn inward. My thoughts can quickly become consumed by questions like:
How am I feeling?
Why am I feeling this way?
What if this happens?
What does this mean?
How do I make this feeling stop?
Before long, my thoughts, my emotions, my circumstances- my world, so to speak- can become the entire focus.
Anxiety has a way of making us look within, but not always in a beneficial way. There’s a difference between healthy self-awareness and becoming completely absorbed in what’s happening inside of us. Anxiety can pull us so deeply into our own thoughts and feelings that we almost become absent from what’s happening around us.
If you experience anxiety of your own, you can probably relate.
Of course, I believe it’s important to allow ourselves to feel freely without judgment. We need space to healthfully process our thoughts and emotions rather than constantly trying to push them away, but like most things in life, there needs to be balance.
Recently, I was experiencing some anxious thoughts and began to pray. Prayer is another tool I’ve learned to lean on throughout the years, and it helps me immensely. For me, prayer can interrupt the destructive thought loops that sometimes create an anxiety spiral and help redirect my mind toward something outside of myself.
This particular time, I prayed, “God, remove my anxious thoughts and give me peace.”
And almost immediately, a thought came to me:
“Stop thinking about yourself. Think of others.”
Written out, it sounds pretty direct, and maybe even a little harsh, but it didn’t land that way at all. It landed as a simple truth that I knew I needed to apply.
So I did.
I shifted my attention away from everything happening inside of me and began thinking about the people around me. How might they be feeling? What could they be experiencing right now? Is someone else struggling? Is there an opportunity for me to encourage someone, listen to someone, or simply be more present?
I began to wonder: If I pause and step outside of my own thoughts for a moment, might I gain some clarity? Some direction? Maybe even some peace?
And then I noticed something.
The anxiety began to lessen- dramatically.
Within a few minutes, it was completely gone.
Let me be clear- I’m not suggesting that thinking about other people is some kind of magic cure for anxiety, because I know it isn’t. Anxiety can be chronic and, at times, debilitating. There are situations where we need more support, more tools, and sometimes professional help.
But for some of the day-to-day anxiety many of us experience from time to time, I’ve found this shift in perspective incredibly helpful.
The nature of anxiety seems to narrow our view. It can make whatever we’re thinking or feeling seem enormous because, in that moment, it’s all we can see. When we feel out of control, it’s easy to get caught in chaotic thought cycles that feed on themselves.
But what if, when we recognize that happening, we gently widen the lens?
Not by criticizing ourselves for feeling anxious. Not by pretending our emotions aren’t real, and not by forcing ourselves to “get over it,” or "just move on."
Just by shifting our attention for a little while.
I’ve started thinking of it as two simple steps: first, becoming aware that my focus has narrowed inward (which is limiting), and second, intentionally redirecting that focus outward.
Maybe that means thinking about someone I love or asking another person how they’re doing and really listening. Maybe it means doing something kind, praying for someone else, stepping outside and noticing what’s around me, or finding one small way to be useful, helpful, or just more present.
I have noticed- there’s something freeing about remembering that there is an entire world happening beyond the thoughts running through my mind.
For me, that has become a practical tool I can reach for when anxiety starts pulling me inward. It doesn’t mean my feelings don’t matter, because they do. It simply reminds me that my feelings don’t have to occupy my entire field of vision, and they don't have to dominate my day or my life.
Because sometimes peace doesn’t come from finally resolving every anxious thought.
Sometimes it begins when I stop trying to figure everything out, look up, and notice someone or something outside of myself.
So today, if you find yourself caught in an anxious loop, give this a try and see if it helps you the way it helps me. Take a few deep breaths, and intentionally shift your focus to the people and world around you.
You might be surprised by just how powerful such a simple shift can be.
